Raising Resilient, Responsible, Compassionate Kids from the Inside Out
A Parenting Revolution is a change in the parenting paradigm, a revolution that will not only change our family life but also transform our culture and society. It is a shift in values away from the antiquated ways of raising kids, away from the high pressure, mentally unhealthy, over-technologized, materialistic, self-centered way that most kids are growing up today.
This next step in our evolution is a shift toward a recognition of, and focus on, our child’s inner spirit. This inner spirit is their essence and is where a life of confidence, inner security, compassion, and personal success begins. Our kids were born with their inner essence - it is what makes them the unique, special individual that they are.
A child’s true nature is what drives and enlivens them. It is what makes them tick. It is the real them at the most fundamental, soul level. A child who is raised in alignment with their inner essence is more likely to grow into an independent, secure, well-adjusted child because it is building the child’s inside before the outside. The inside, their true nature, is the basis from which a child grows to be responsible, resilient, and compassionate. Or, if they lose their connection with their inner spirit, it can be the basis from which a child grows to be irresponsible, anxious, and selfish. As parents, our most basic and important job is to make that inside solid and unshakeable. We can do this by paying attention to and taking the time to understand and truly connect with their inner essence.
When we connect with our child at the deepest, most substantive level, we can parent from a place of higher consciousness. This is not necessarily how we were parented, or how the latest parenting books say we should parent, or how our in-laws tell us to parent. It is responding to our child’s own, unique behaviors and needs. It is parenting to their special nature that is rooted in their inner spirit. This may mean, for example, that our child needs a lot of physical contact with us, spending time sitting in our lap, needing lots of hugs and kisses. Or our child’s inner spirit may dislike too much physical contact, preferring to be alone and live in a more solitary way. Maybe our child is always on the run, rarely stopping to sit and talk. None of these are good or bad, right or wrong. They just are. And they are perfectly fine, just the way they are. To encourage our child’s true nature to shine honors their inner spirit.
We raise our kids to make them conform and fit in with certain societal expectations, live according to the expectations of others and strive to be the best as defined by society. This way of raising kids is inauthentic and leads to an existence solely for appearances and extrinsic rewards. This way of living leads to weaknesses and is unsustainable in the long run. Alternatively, living from one’s inner spirit, according to one’s true nature, is living a life of truth. It is a way of living from natural strength and is fully sustainable because one’s inner spirit does not change or abandon them – it is always there. Societal expectations, wishes and desires, and agendas from others will come and go, but your child’s inner spirit will always be a part of them.
Surface living is similar to what Eckhart Tolle calls horizontal living, as compared to vertical living. Vertical living is a life that extends from heaven above, through our beings, and down into the earth below. This type of life is steadfast, strong, and unwavering; it is living from our core, connecting our head, heart, and soul, between heaven and earth. Horizontal living, on the other hand, has no depth, no substance. It is flat, superficial, with nothing below the surface. Surface living is exactly that–living from and on the surface, living horizontally. Imagine looking out over the ocean to the horizon. What is on the surface? Boats coming and going, birds diving for fish, weather changing from sun to clouds.
The water on the surface may be smooth or it may be choppy. There are ups and down with the peaks and troughs of the waves. We get lulled into complacency with calm waters. We become manic with the high waves. Surface living is living half asleep, going through the motions of day-to-day living for temporary, superficial pleasures. Surface living depends on external conditions, external activities, and approval. We seek transient pleasures–the next day off from work, the next vacation, the next pay bonus, the next drink, or toke to numb the monotony of this ocean surface living. Riptides occur on the surface, and we might, at any moment, get sucked out to sea. Just as riptides are completely out of our control, much of life is out of our control. External influences and occurrences come at us and act like the waves lifting us up or sucking us under. What is in our control, however, is how we choose to respond to life’s events.
Go below the surface to find the real substance of ocean life. Deep below the surface, the ocean is teeming with life, a different world from the one we know above on the surface. Down deep is where the fish live, where colorful coral grows and nourishes the ocean-atmosphere. This ocean depth is where the life force for the entire ocean exists. It is the beat, the rhythm, the energy on which the ocean thrives. It is a world of color, beauty, movement, and wonder, unobserved by the surface dweller. Living beyond the surface takes you to the extraordinary depths of life. Every day holds greater richness, significance, meaning, and substance, even if nothing changes on the surface.
Julie Hatch is sharing this excerpt from her new book "A Parenting Revolution for Higher Evolution".
You can preorder her book on Amazon by CLICKING HERE
Parenting Expert - Holistic Health Practitioner - Pediatric Nurse Practitioner
Do you sometimes wonder if you’re doing the right thing for your child—making the right choices for them? Are you struggling with how to handle their challenging behavior? Are the time-outs and punishments not working anymore and you don’t know what to do next? Are you worried about your child because of their behavior at home or getting in trouble at school?
I get it. I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to raise a child with ADHD. I know what it’s like to be a working mother. I’ve raised three kids through divorce. And none of it is easy! Parenting is not easy. But it doesn’t have to be a struggle.
I am Julie Hatch, a licensed pediatric nurse practitioner and a holistic health practitioner of Chinese Medicine. I have over 30 years of working as a nurse practitioner, and over 30 years of raising three awesome kids!
I started my parent coaching business, Mums on a Mission (M.O.M.), because I saw an urgent need to help parents understand and handle child-raising challenges, and to help them connect with their kids in a new way that takes the stress and strain out of parenting.